Baby Dickey » Rants & Raves

Whatever makes you laugh

babydickey — Mon, 13 Jun 2011 19:28:27 +0000

Ya know how sometimes things are just SO BAD all you can do is laugh? Because otherwise you’d cry. Like flying with a toddler? lol. Yea, that post will come. I need to save up energy just to think about that experience again, haha.

This is a stupid story. But it was really funny (and terrible) at the moment, so I’m sharing it.

I went over to my mom’s to pick up Ryan this morning–he had a sleepover there last night. Our cats are out of food and I didn’t feel like going to the store so I was borrowing some from my mom. She had just bought a huge bag of cat food so I picked it up and poured it into her cat food dispenser container thingy for her–helping out! I then used that container to pour some food into a ziploc bag that I could take home.

My mom was watching me do this.

Suddenly, the top came off the container as I was pouring.

ALL the cat food went everywhere. EVERYWHERE, I TELL YOU!

Apparently my face was one of complete shock and horror and surprise and AHHHHHHHH! And my mom immediately started cracking up and she told me she wished she had a camera. I wished I had a time machine.

EVERYWHERE.

What else to do but laugh?

But wait. Then I ask my mom if that happens often. She said.….….….….….…. “YES.” Thanks for the warning! More laughing (to keep from possibly strangling her?)

And thank goodness I wasn’t at home alone to clean the mess myself. My mom helped and Ryan did his best to help, haha. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh what a pain. A million bajillion tiny pieces of cat food. All.Over.

Shari Criso’s facebook question yesterday was “what always makes your baby or child laugh?” so I thought of situations like this!

Then… I got an email a little bit ago from Hallmark. They have a new campaign called “Life is a Special Occasion” and the point is to push the pause button on daily life and stop to think about the beauty of unplanned and imperfect moments. Of course there are a MILLION moments with Ryan that I could think of. But it was just perfect timing to get this email right after this CATastrophe (ha, get it? I’m funny) and it was all I could think of. So you’re supposed to complete the phrase “_________ is a special occasion!” And this is what I’ve got: Being a daughter is a special occasion! My mom always (okay, MOST of the time ) makes me laugh!

Now.….…. wait for it.….….….….

AFTER ALL OF THAT, I FORGOT THE FREAKING BAG OF CAT FOOD OVER THERE. ha.. ha… boo.

Google got my goat this week

babydickey — Mon, 15 Nov 2010 14:00:55 +0000

The lovely lady over at Crunchy VT Mommy is the host of “things that got my goat” each week and I love participating. Who doesn’t like complaining?! So check out her blog and join in on the fun.

What got my goat this week is a good one–and as I’m about to say this, I better watch out for the lightning that’s about to strike me down: GOOGLE. Yes, google got my goat. And I’m glad I’m not on blogger as I post this [part of google] for fear my blog would be gone tomorrow morning [google is all-knowing and all-powerful].

Google page rank. If you blog, you must know what I’m talking about it. It’s a ranking system that seems to be the tell-all for how “good” a blog is. 0 is the lowest, 10 is the best. For example, google.com has a PR of 10… wikipedia.com has a PR of 9… brand new blogs will start out at n/a (or 0). If you want to check yours, go here: Google PR. When you’re working with companies and PR reps for advertising or product reviews, many of them look at your google page rank as a factor.

Google PR is supposed to be updated once a quarter. But it hasn’t been updated since April. I have a PR of 2. When I wrote at my old domain name, I had a PR of 3… when I purchased my own domain in February, I went alllllll the way back down to zero. During the April update, I jumped to 2. And haven’t moved since.

Why does that get my goat? Companies turning blogs down based solely on google PR. If updated, I’d be at least at a 3, maybe a 4?! But it hasn’t been updated. And what I get is a 2. And companies turning me (and others) away because of it.

What gets my goat is certain criteria companies place: they may require 500 twitter followers (I have 2600+) and 500 subscribers (I have 1100+), but also a PR of 3. And although I’m above and beyond the other stats, I get turned away because google can’t get their act together and update the dang thing.

But even if google DOES update it sometime soon.… what the heck is google PR based on? As I said, google is all-knowing and all-powerful. They do what they want. A lot depends on how many incoming links you have to your blog… and not from Joe Blow’s tiny little blog, but from REAL websites. BIG websites. They make a difference. Best plan of action? Guest post on websites, get your name and LINK out there.

But… as I’ve said… none of that matters at all if google can’t get the page rank system updated. So my real dream? People stop using google page rank as the be-all end-all to what makes a blog GOOD. How about you come to my blog and spend 5 minutes looking around and see for yourself if it’s “good” and if it’s something you’d like to work with? Why trust some third party system that’s based on really who knows what and is set by someone who has never even SEEN my blog?

Google, you’ve REALLY got my goat.

((If you’re annoyed by this as well and want to send the message to google AND to companies, write your own post! Voices need to be heard and opinions need to be expressed if we want any change. So go write your post about Google Page Rank and add it to the linky here: Why is everyone so stuck on Google’s page rank? But hurry, this linky closes on Nov 17!))

I.Am.Livid. Do you have no heart?

babydickey — Wed, 06 Oct 2010 20:56:50 +0000

I just came across a blog where the mama wrote about the recent death of her baby boy. This baby boy had CHD (congenital heart defect), which resulted in death. But this baby boy was also circumcised and had bleeding issues… that may have contributed to the death. Yes, I cried. Yes, I searched through her blog to read more. Then I discovered all the talk around the web about it. And I became pissed.

THIS MOTHER JUST LOST HER SON. HER BABY.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT CIRCUMCISION.

I don’t care if you circumcised your son or if you didn’t. I’ll be honest: I circumcised Ryan. But with all I know about it now, I would never circumcise again. So I’ve been on both sides of the fence. This mother made her decision that her and her husband believed to be the best for their son. Obviously they would not wish this fate upon him. Obviously this mama feels enough guilt and regret as it is.

Why am I livid? The unbelievably inconsiderate assholes that are attacking this poor mama for circumcising her son. She’s being called selfish.. her faith in God is being questioned… people are telling her that she was warned. Seriously? Have you no heart? I don’t give an eff if you’re the Queen of the Intactivists and you know everything there is to know about circumcision and why it’s wrong. Get off your effing high horse. This is not your place. It is NOT the time to spew your hate and your facts and your belittling comments to a grieving mother.

That’s great that you stand for something… that you feel so strongly about something and want to make a difference. But to a family that just lost their baby boy? Get a fucking life. And if you want to pick on someone, pick on me. I circumcised Ryan.

Other friends share their thoughts on the issue:
Little BGCG: chd, not circumcision.
Mama B: People Suck.

Back to Blogging: a post to read

babydickey — Wed, 15 Sep 2010 03:06:48 +0000

All week I’m writing on topics suggested by the SITS girls to help people get back to blogging now that summer is over. Yesterday I reposted my very first post ever. Today I’m supposed to repost one of my favorites… a post I wish more people had read. I didn’t even have one in mind so I went searching through them all and I started at the beginning. Honestly? I couldn’t do it. I was scrolling past the names of the posts and of course we have my weekly pregnancy updates (yawn) and random big, fat preggo stories. Then we move closer to the birth and I see posts titled “My Birth Plan” and “Circumcision.” I couldn’t even bring myself to open them and look. Figuring my birth plan would make me cry–not only seeing what I wanted (and didn’t get), but also probably how naive I was at the time. Circumcision post? Let’s not even go there. I’ll just say no future sons of mine will be circumcised.

I was reminded of a few great things: my preggo talent of resting glasses of milk on my belly, my new outlook on life, anniversaries with the hubby, great friends…

And then a post about my grandpa passing away. And then my birth story. And you know what still kills me about that? Sure most people knew Ryan had been born either by phone, twitter or facebook.… but I didn’t post it on my blog. When I got home from the hospital and was finally out of my drugged up state, the first thing I wrote about wasn’t my baby boy. It wasn’t a picture of him saying LOOK! HE’S SO PERFECT! Nope. It was a post (actually, like 3 or 4 posts) about my birth story. And how horrendous and traumatizing it was and how much I hated it and cried over it.

Then one day I realized–OMG, I need to write a “welcome to the world!” post for Ryan! Mommy fail. And actually, I think about that quite often. It still kills me.

THOSE are the memories that came up when trying to do this stupid assignment. #bitter.

But, don’t worry, I didn’t fail you–I’ve picked out a post that is more light-hearted. Something that is funny. I wrote this when Ryan was just over 3 months old. It’s called:

Pre– and Post-Baby Brain Images

I’ve been thinking about this for awhile… I wrote a post on my Baby Brain and was told it’s called Momnesia… I love that term, it’s perfect! I seriously can’t remember anything anymore, including how to spell. Yesterday I went to get my bowl from the microwave and opened the pantry door instead. More than once I’ve tried to put cereal in the refrigerator and milk in the cupboard.

I’ve decided this is what I used my brain for before baby:

That seems pretty accurate, right? Well… this is the mush it has turned into:

Mommy's new vocabulary

babydickey — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 20:41:22 +0000

Yes, it’s true that I’ve said “poop” more times in the last 8 months than I’ve said in my previous 25 years of life–or some form of it: poo, stinkies, poopoo, stinky butt, doodoo, or if I’m feeling really crazy it’s “did stinky butt go poopoodooooodiddly doodoo?”

The same is true for farts. Toots, tootoos, poot, pooty, stinky… and it’s no wonder children grow up to think poop and farts are silly–every time I hear one of them come from my tiny lil boy, I get a huge smile (ya, who would have thought?!) and say, “what did you just do??!!!” with such enthusiasm you’d think he just cured cancer or landed on the moon. Sometimes I clap and laugh, or even say GOOD JOB!

Words and actions that have entered my every day life (even when Ryan is not around):

“bye-bye!“
blowing bubbles or raspberries
my motherese tone (think high pitched and too happy)
“good job!“
“nuhh-uhhh”

And I’m sure this habit only gets worse as time goes on. I catch myself talking to my cats this way (ok, not a big deal), but when I start talking that way to my in-laws… or my students… just call me mom.

But what’s funny? That’s not what this post is about.

MY new vocabulary includes all the bad words in the book. If you know me in real life, you know I don’t swear. It’s just not something I’ve ever done and to have any of those words come out of my mouth is completely awkward. Was completely awkward.

Now? Mother f*#king $h*t. It seems like I use a swear word in nearly every sentence. Having a baby tests your patience like you wouldn’t believe… some days I think “hell yea I totally ROCK this patience thing.” Other days I’m like “get me the EFF out of here, Ryan is going out the window and the next person I see is getting punched in the effing face.” Replace any nice terms with more vulgar ones.

Just about everything is now extreme enough to deserve an expletive. Phone rings and it’s on the other side of the room: ^&$*. We’re out of ice?! *&^$. Ohhh, #%^* I just dropped my notebook. %^& #$%*, I just missed the green light. WHAT THE #%^@ is this dirty dish doing on the @$#%&* counter?! and WHY are these clothes still in the ^%$@ dryer?! The house is a &*# mess. We don’t have any *&$ ice cream and my @#&(* boobs hurt from nursing all night long.

I keep reminding myself I better stop this &*%^& habit before Ryan starts talking! That’s the LAST thing we need–proof for the rest of the world that we suck as parents when our toddler says “%^& you!” when someone budges us in line at the grocery store.

I sound like a b^&*$ don’t I? I know I’m not the only one.… let’s hear from all the other mothers out there–what’s YOUR favorite word?!

MOMS For The 21st Century Act: we need your help!

babydickey — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 03:16:05 +0000

We’re going to get somewhere, I swear. We’re going to make things happen. And it’s about.damn.time. On July 21, 2010, Congresswoman Roybal-Allard (CA-34) introduced the Maximizing Optimal Maternity Services (MOMS) for the 21st Century Act, a bill that includes measures to improve maternity care in our nation. This bill still needs co-sponsors. PLEASE write or call your rep today and ask them to co-sponsor this bill. Find yours here: Representative Offices.

Safe motherhood should be a basic right for all women.

Raw Milk: having choices

babydickey — Sun, 11 Jul 2010 17:57:14 +0000

A letter to the men of Iran

babydickey — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 02:00:39 +0000

It was announced that the Iranian woman accused of adultery would NOT be stoned to death. The international outcry at this barbaric and inhumane treatment caused judicial authorities in Iran to release a statement retracting her stoning sentence. However, she remains on death row and it looks as though they will hang her instead after all the hype dies down.

There is no victory here. Death by hanging for a mother of two who was forced to “confess” is equally as sickening.

And? All media outlets have been banned from reporting on the issue. Newspapers, agencies, and TV channels–no one can comment on her death sentence.

AND the statement that she will not be stoned to death was NOT released in Iran–nor was the stoning death sentence for 15 other Iranians.

The last time a woman was stoned to death was in 2007–she also had been forced to confess to adultery when they threatened to pour boiling water over her head if she didn’t. Her execution was done in secret.

I cannot stop thinking about this and I have some thoughts for the men of Iran:

Do you not realize that you wouldn’t be here today, in this world, were it not for women? How can you have so little respect for the strong and courageous females that birthed you and fed you? What are you compensating for? Are you so little minded, so ignorant and cowardly, that you have to publicly display these chauvinistic acts against human-kind? Stoning a woman to death as she’s half buried in the ground… does that make you feel like big, strong men? Does that finally make you feel important? Well it makes me, and the rest of the world, feel sick. You’re a disgrace.

*I realize this happens in other places. Saudi Arabia… Afghanistan, Libya, Sudan… and why it’s so hard to change? Read about Sharia Law.*

Disgusted by the human race: stoning

babydickey — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 02:53:07 +0000

Without television in our house, I’m often a bit behind on world news. I know I can read about it online, but I don’t have much time for that either. Thank goodness for twitter and other conversation… I could have, however, gone forever without hearing about this–but then what change would ever come about? Ignorance is not always bliss.

A woman in Iran is going to be stoned to death.

The U.N. Universal Declaration of Human Rights clearly states that, “No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.”

I just found this article from BBC News (August 2008) stating that stoning sentences are rarely carried out and that Iran had suspended the punishment of death by stoning. Amnesty International called on Iran in January (2008) to abolish what it called a “horrific practice, designed to increase the suffering” of those condemned. Well.…… apparently it has been reinstated.

This woman’s crime? What could this MOTHER of TWO have done to deserve being buried up to her chest and stoned to death. Stoned with rocks large enough to cause pain and damage, but not large enough to kill. It doesn’t matter what she did, I’m appalled and horrified that things like this still take place in the world.

But if you must know, this 43-year-old woman was charged with adultery. She finally confessed after brutal “questioning” and her family swears her innocence. She received 99 lashings for that and has been in jail for 5 years. Her two children get to visit her for 15 minutes every Monday. She paid her dues and her record now states innocence. However, the case was recently reopened and the decision was made to stone her to death.

Get this… Iran was selected to serve on the United Nations Commission on the Status Of Women. This country, that is STONING WOMEN. Imagine if we stoned citizens of the United States for committing adultery. And before you just read this and think about how sad it is and then move on to your next task, I want you to stop. Stop and picture it… this woman, this mother, this daughter, this sister… is going to be BURIED and STONED and left for days until she dies. She has two children. Just imagine it, will you?

And now do something about it.

First–there’s a bill to condemn the selection of Iran to serve on the United Nations Commission on the Status of Women. Write your congressman a letter! Show your support for this bill!

Second–this stoning can be prevented. We CAN save this mother. WE CAN. Write a letter to the UN High Commissioner for the Office of Human Rights and demand this stoning be stopped. All it takes is a letter. And look–a sample letter is written for you, it can’t get any easier. Do it, right now.

Just because it’s not happening in your own backyard doesn’t mean it’s not important. It doesn’t mean it doesn’t affect you. For crying out loud, Iran is being selected to serve on the UN Commission on the Status of Women! That’s close enough to your own backyard. Women and men everywhere should be outraged and appalled and should NOT tolerate this kind of abuse. Stand up!

Two memories of the hospital I CANNOT get over. Help?

babydickey — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 22:24:59 +0000

I know I just posted about c-sections and sometimes I wonder how much babble about it my readers can handle, but I’ve been meaning to write about these issues for awhile and I wanted to address some of the comments on my last post… so I decided now was a good time for this post. Thanks for putting up with me

I feel I’ve made tremendous progress in dealing with my c-section. I still rant about it on occasion, but much less tears. I don’t know the stages of grieving… when does anger come in? I think that’s where I am. Some days I’m even like “yea I had a c-section, who cares? no big deal” and other days I’m still a mess. I think the “who cares” days are a coping mechanism, because of course I still care–a lot.

Two things in this post. First–there are 2 fairly recent realizations I’ve had about my c-section that I’m having trouble getting past. Second–a response to many of the comments on my last c-section post.

First… The hospital stay, the surgery, the mother-baby unit… it’s all blurry. Random memories pop into my head, even still. And right now, there are two that I absolutely cannot get past. They’ve been lingering in the back of my mind for probably a month now (that’s how behind I am on writing this post). These two things… I’m not sure I can ever get past… I get SO very angry thinking about them. Ok.… first.…. I felt the pressure. I think it’s the closest thing I have to feeling anything of a natural birth. I’ve heard that when it’s time to push, you will know it–no questions asked. So obviously I wasn’t there, but I definitely felt the downward pressure. I remember getting really excited and when the nurse came in the room, I told her about it–in my super excited, smiley voice, like “the baby is coming soon!” But.… the nurse completely discounted my feelings. She told me the pressure couldn’t possibly be the baby. She made me think that maybe I had to go to the bathroom. Or that I couldn’t really feel it because I had an epidural. I remember being SO disappointed, my body physically slumped down. And I totally believed her. I thought “oh shoooooot, this isn’t it, I’m not close yet.” But I KNOW that’s what it was. I was at 8 cm and had just gone to +1 station. It breaks my heart. That was the feeling of him moving down (not being stuck), that was the feeling of the beginning of delivery. How much longer till it was time to push? How much longer did I need? a;slkjfd;alskjfda;lsdjf;lakdjf

The second thing… damned if I do, damned if I don’t. They told me I needed an internal monitor to check the strength of my contractions (because I wasn’t progressing “fast enough.”) They said if the monitor showed that my contractions weren’t strong enough, even with all that freakin’ pitocin, I’d need a c-section. I freaked out, they put in the monitor and after awhile a nurse came in to look at the charts. I asked her what the contraction strength looked like and she frowned and said it looked like they were NOT strong enough (= c-section) but that the OB would have to look at them. I freaked out some more. The OB came in and she said–well, the contractions are strong enough!–and I distinctly remember smiling and getting really excited. Oh THANK GOD! That means they’re okay and I don’t need a c-section, whoohoo!! .…… and then the OB continued her sentence… “So what that means is that they’re strong enough but they’re not doing anything. they aren’t doing their job. And we don’t know why. He’s probably stuck and too big to fit out. So, you need a c-section.” Heartbreak. I sobbed, immediately. WHY didn’t I realize in that moment what they just did to me?! I didn’t realize it for months afterward.

If the contractions are NOT strong enough, I need a c-section. If the contractions ARE strong enough, it means they aren’t working and I need a c-section. WTF?! CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THE EFF WAS THE POINT OF THE INTERNAL MONITOR IF I WAS DAMNED EITHER WAY. PLEASE. WHY why why did I not see their nasty, sneaky, manipulative ways?!?!?! Why didn’t I notice?! The outcome was c-section in their minds no matter what the fuck the charts said. I HATE PEOPLE. and now I’m crying. Who can help me get past these two things?! BLAH.

Second… I got quite a few comments in my last c-section post telling me not to worry, it’s not my fault, etc. Thank you, really–I know you all mean well and are trying to help me out. But it’s so much easier said than done. I had an unnecessary c-section and I still replay that last moment in my head over and over. The moment we consented to the surgery. (I know it’s not healthy to play the “what if” game, but I can’t help it, yet). What if I said no one more time? What if I asked for 1 more hour? What if… ? So yes, of course I still feel like it was my fault I ended up with the c-section, even though I know you will all tell me it was the system that failed me. I’m not there yet, okay? I hope one day I will get there, absolutely. But I’m not yet.

So yes, there are long-term side effects of having c-sections and if I have any of them, or if Ryan has any of them, I will of course feel that it is my fault because I feel that the c-section was my fault. For now, anyway, that’s how I feel.

Baby Dickey » Rants & Raves

Whatever makes you laugh

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Google got my goat this week

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I.Am.Livid. Do you have no heart?

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Back to Blogging: a post to read

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Mommy's new vocabulary

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MOMS For The 21st Century Act: we need your help!

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Raw Milk: having choices

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A letter to the men of Iran

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Disgusted by the human race: stoning

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Two memories of the hospital I CANNOT get over. Help?

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